What they are doing right now...

[Guzzitza]

To lighten the dooms day mood, a quick laugh ( at something other than the way we are playing footy);
Stare into the magic crystal ball, or just stare at your computer screen, and see what the players are doing right this second!!

MOL: Walks around his home constantly diving and falling for no reason, looks around for the umpire to give him a free-kick - realises there is no one watching, but decides continue diving anyway. Contemplates strapping up for the next game, right ankle, left ankle, right knee, left knee, wrist, arm, head... Realises that he'll need more tape,6 rolls to be exact, and it is a Monday - "Damn, I should have started this yesterday".

BBBH: Shaves his face, and his head, splashes on some Emporio Armani after-shave then wipes himself dry with $100 bills. Notices that he could use a tan. Phones Buchanan, asks if hed like to come over for a bbq so he can be thrown over the back-fence without apology. Phones an umpire, tells him he can shove his 50m up his as#hole cos he loves em.

LRT: Reapplies peroxide. Runs around in circles in his bedroom. Trips over an AFL ball and ponders ""What is this? How did it get here? What do i do with it?!". Stares up at his George Gregan poster and thinks; if only i was short, black, and talented...

McVeigh: Sits by a sewing machine and a bunch of Swans jerseys, continues to sew the number "5"on to each jersey in the hope that someone will remember his drafting so he can get a game.

Jolly: Ponders why he left Melbourne.

Maxfield: Tries to carve notch no. 200 into his wall, but misses - "Damnit!"he thinks "?f only i could hit a target".

Davis: Thinks; "Well at least its not as bad as Collingwood - theyve got Eddie!"

Doyle: Sits in a giant inflatable bubble, yet somehow gets injured - eats 5 plates of pasta then wins the cross-code fitness test - but is still unable to play.

J.Bolton: throws darts at ROK's picture "Damn you golden locks!". Contemplates growing he hair longer to reclaim his "Glamour boy of the Swans" title, then remembers; ""Pfft Screw ROK, I'm the runner up Cleo-bachelor of the Year! Im gorgeous".

B.Matthews: Unsure of what day it is, or what his name is. Watches kids play "brandings"in the playground - reconfirms his belief the principle aim of any ball spot is to AVOID the ball and run in circles.

Stay tuned for more, feel free to add your own.

[NMWBloods]

Crouch is waiting in queue for sandwiches, but has his back to the staff and is watching the guy behind him, making sure he doesn't cut the queue and get past him to the sandwiches first. Cleverly blocks the guy from pushing past, but fails to notice that 3 more people have walked past him in the meantime and he doesn't manage to get a sandwich until all the good ones have gone. Goes to take a bite but shoves it up his left nostril instead.

Kennelly given award of Tag Dag of the Year - when accepting award sprints onto stage but instead of shaking hands with the presenter, accidentally puts him in head lock - shakes head in disbelief that he's done it yet again.

[sharpie]

Dempster: has a lot more free time on his hands these days coz he's finally convinced his phone is working after spending 12 weeks last year beside the phone, picking it up every 5 minutes to make sure its working, and when he hears the dial tone thinks to himself: "why doesnt Roosy ring me?".

[mocaholic]

Leapin Leo: Has failed his drivers licence for the umpteenth time as for the life of him he just can't understand how drivers can stay on the right side of the car.

Paul Roos: Out buying a set of overalls to fit in with his working class midfield.

Adam Schneider: Has been out trying to pick up tall women but always makes mistakes when deciding to go long.

[ROK Lobster]

Paul Roos: writing a note explaining why his kids haven't done their maths homework but have coloured in the pictures in the text book instead: "We are a blue collar family. The kids don't have academic talent. We want to adopt next year, see if we can pick up some talent there, but until then you wont be seeing any homework from the Roos kids. They just are not up to it."

[ROK Lobster]

Swans midfield: All around at Jude's place staring at each other in a confused silence. Were having a great old game of Twister until the spinning pointer stopped on a foot. No one knows what to do.

[cruiser]

O'Keefe: Out buying new head bands after checking out surf. Curses that he had to fly all the way to Perth on the w'end and missed a great on shore swell. Wonders whether professional surfing would pay better than AFL football.

[cruiser]

Nick Davis: Eats breakfast at MacDonalds, lunch at KFC and dinner at Pizza Hut. Bored with kicking behinds instead of goals, he calls Roosters coach Ricky Stewart to ask if its not too late to switch codes.

[mocaholic]

David Spriggs: Going for a run.

[b0ek]

Buchanan, Schneider and Spriggs: Heading off to Mount Doom to destroy the one ring...

Maxfield: Trying and failing to catch a tortoise that has stolen his false teeth (simpsons reference!)

[floppinab]

Originally posted by ROK Lobster
Swans midfield: All around at Jude's place staring at each other in a confused silence. Were having a great old game of Twister until the spinning pointer stopped on a foot. No one knows what to do.

Post of the year in thread of the year for mine.

As much as I think he will be a great footballer :

P. Bevan : Decides to drive down the freeway on the wrong side of the road in his Barina. Goes OK dodging around the motorbikes but comes up against a semi-trailer and decides to he can run right through it with no problem. When he comes out the other side completely flattened he decides to just sit in car thinking the police won't notice.

[ROK Lobster]

Originally posted by mocaholic
David Spriggs: Going for a run.

Didn't bother to take a ball.

[Guzzitza]

Tadgh: Drinks a pint of guiness for breakfast, and another one for lunch. Goes to church wearing his favourite pair of pumas. Watches reruns of his ass-tastic Tv add.

[satchmopugdog]

Andrew Schauble is out helping the poor but nowadays it is during the day as by the time he gets there the night shift is over.

[ROK Lobster]

Schneider: in front of the TV, has borrowed motorace's 2003 highlights DVD. Applauds wildly a freakish gather and snap goal from the pocket.

Paul Roos walks into the room: points out that Adam could have forced a stoppage. Asks Adam to return the DVD.